Introduction
People who are emotionally available have obvious advantages and disadvantages. Being emotionally available is good, but being too emotionally available will have disadvantages. Let’s analyze it in detail below!
The strengths of emotionally available people
Pay attention to the needs of others
Judith Orloff, a clinical psychologist at the University of California, Los Angeles, believes that emotionally available people are open-minded and always want to help others, but they often sacrifice too much of their own interests for this purpose and are easily exhausted. And they dislike those who are selfish.
Be an excellent listener
Emotionally available people want to understand all the details of a thing, so they listen more and speak less to understand other people’s thoughts and feelings. During the listening process, they also pay special attention to the other party’s non-verbal cues, understand the emotions inside and outside the talker’s words, and ultimately form a prudent and comprehensive judgment.
Others like to ask you for advice
People who are going through a difficult time want thoughtful feedback and strong support. If you are emotionally available, you will be considered a reliable person to talk to. People around you will tell you things they usually don’t tell others and ask you for advice. Others often start with “I’ve never told anyone about this, and I hope you can keep it a secret.” They treat your empathic self as a psychotherapist.
People who are emotionally available also have side effects. They don’t know how to stop other people’s unrestrained emotions, and they themselves are too invested in other people’s feelings. This can leave them feeling anxious, suffocated, and physically and mentally exhausted. Overstimulation and too much talking can drain their energy.
Is a natural leader
Employees will perform better if their boss is emotionally available. This is because employees trust their bosses to have their best interests at heart. Such a boss is good at listening, open-minded, and considerate of his employees; employees also trust the open-minded boss and are willing to communicate more with him.
Love animals
Even animals are attracted to people who are sensitive and truly care about them. People who are emotionally available will give unconditional love to their pets. They are willing to hug and play with their pets more often, and will try their best to adopt them if possible.
They are overwhelmed by horrific events in life or on television
Seeing unpleasant or tragic things in the news, movies, and television can upset emotionally available people and even make them tearful, sick, or anxious. It is difficult for them not to sympathize with vulnerable people in distress, and they feel deeply guilty for those who really cannot help. Most people who feel emotionally available are probably not people with blue emotions. People with blue emotions are very rational and should be orange.
Ability to feel the physical discomfort of others
An emotionally available person is like a sponge, absorbing the emotions of those around him. Every move, headache, and fever of others will attract their attention, and they can empathize with them.
Ability to recognize when others are lying
Emotionally available people can easily recognize that something or someone is wrong. Because they can easily read other people’s emotions and find out whether someone is lying. The evidence lies in the fact that the person’s behavior is inconsistent with his words, or what he said is inconsistent with the facts.
Go out of your way to help someone in pain
Others’ injuries are like their own injuries. Emotionally available people want to help the injured and feel they have an inevitable responsibility for the happiness of those around them.
Disadvantages of emotionally available people
Emotions are too delicate
The most obvious characteristic of emotionally available people is that their emotions are too delicate. Generally speaking, we don’t care too much about other people’s unintentional words; for careless people, we won’t pay much attention to other people’s unintentional words; but for emotionally available people, we care very much about everything others say talk.
They not only have to analyze the meaning of this sentence, but also analyze the subtext of this sentence, and also associate it with recent events. Anyway, an originally simple sentence, after being heard by emotionally available people, always requires some analysis and interpretation. They will take what others say as a joke seriously.
Sensitive inside
People who are emotionally available are sensitive and responsive to various stimuli in interpersonal interactions. Sensitive traits are based on individual physiology. Such people’s skin sensitivity, eye penetration, smell ability, hearing ability, etc. are all more sensitive than other people. According to relevant psychological theories, people with sensitive hearts lack a sense of security and do not trust their surroundings enough, so they always feel on tenterhooks.
Based on this, when they work with others, they always pay attention to other people’s actions and words, and it is difficult not to be affected by others. They may not want to be so sensitive, but based on these characteristics, they have to be so sensitive, and it is difficult to change the situation. So in married life, they are more likely to feel emotionally destroyed!
Strong dependence
People who are emotionally available are usually very dependent, and their emotions are based on the evaluation of others. They feel particularly happy when others praise them; they feel very sad when others criticize them. Emotionally available people need love, security, belonging and recognition far more than others.
For other people, a word of affirmation from others can give them a sufficient sense of belonging and identity; for people with rich emotions, it may require constant affirmation, or more intimate comfort and recognition before they can get it. This sense of belonging. People who are emotionally available lack the ability to take care of themselves, so they are fragile and sensitive inside.
Why are emotionally available people not satisfied in relationships?
High requirements for relationship intimacy
Emotionally available people have high requirements for intimacy in relationships. Deep in their hearts, even if it is an ordinary friendship, they must always ask for help. Once you are snubbed or ignored by your friends, you will feel uncomfortable and think that your friends are not good to you. The interpersonal relationship they understand is the kind of relationship that does not distinguish between each other, the kind of relationship that helps each other.
People who are emotionally available care very much about whether their friends are loyal to them, and they cannot tolerate a third person in their heart. When you get along with such people, you will feel like they are children. They can act childish and clingy, and feel uneasy if someone they trust is away from them for even a moment. So they generally have emotional support.
What Are Emotional Support Fries?
The Secret Of Emotional Support Water Bottle
High requirements for relationship stability
Emotionally available people have high requirements for the stability of relationships and do not allow others to be distant or close to them. In their understanding, once they identify someone as a friend, they will never allow the other person to ignore them. They treat someone as a friend but never consider what the other person thinks. Deep in their emotions, they believe that others exist to satisfy their own expectations.
If their friends are too busy to take care of them, they will become suspicious and think that they have been abandoned by their friends. They lose their temper with their friends for no reason, the purpose is to attract the other person’s attention and make the other person pay more attention to them. It is conceivable that they are like this to ordinary friends, and they may be even less satisfied with intimate relationships.
High requirements for relationship durability
The friends they identify usually hope that they will never be separated for a lifetime. They do not fall in love easily, and once they fall in love with someone, they hope to never be separated for the rest of their lives. However, people come and go, and fate gathers and disperses. This is an objective law. There is no banquet in the world that never ends. When we are together, cherish each other’s friendship; even if we are no longer together, don’t be too sad. But for people with rich emotions, the most unbearable thing is separation. They are so easily hurt internally because they value relationships between people too much. Only by treating separation as the normal state of life can we truly grow up.
High requirements for relationship harmony
They believe that there should never be quarrels between friends or lovers. They expect a good relationship as a friend or lover, with no quarrels or any disputes. They don’t want to see disagreements, quarrels, alienation, indifference, etc. in relationships, so they always make unconditional compromises in relationships.
They are always avoiding problems in the relationship, just hoping that the two of them can always be together well. But the more this happens, the more uncomfortable it makes the other party, because the other party has a lot to say but can’t. As a result, emotionally available people are always abandoned by friends and lovers.